April 18, 2018

Attempts to attend Starbucks’ “Day of Race Training” thwarted when it is discovered the company maintains a strong anti-Adidas bias.

March 19, 2018

Leverages daughter’s collection of Beanie Boos and Diamellastic™ jewelry to purchase the newly bankrupt Claire’s Ear-Piercing Emporium.

March 17, 2018

Shocked to discover that a company whose business model relies on the mining of its users’ data may not have been super-transparent regarding its acquistion and usage.