Only scant hours after submitting my list, McSweeneys.net has declared my comedic gold nothing more than borscht belt pyrite. Such is life. However, they did make the fatal mistake of inviting me to submit more lists.

And so it begins.

Where Have All the Flowers Gone?

Ӣ Bowling
”¢ To see a guy about, you know, some stuff. So don’t wait up.
Ӣ South Padre
Ӣ To see Fountains of Wayne at the Roxy
Ӣ On a three-hour tour
”¢ To pick up a carton of Merit 100’s
Ӣ Over the river and through the woods
Ӣ To a Tony Robbins seminar

Later,

Fox