I was going to comment on the whole Don Imus imbroglio, but my attorneys advised me that doing so might raise the ire of the Wrong Reverends Sharpton and Jackson. Which was actually more of an encouragement than anything. But then I realized that there was way too much jackassery afoot on all sides to write about, mainly because I have actual work to do. So here’s my short version of this tired story:

Don Imus – Never listened to him. Don’t know much about him. Said a nasty thing and apologized. Was he sincere in either statement? I don’t know. But for a society that let a little extracurricular activity in the Oval Office in late 90s skate by, the punishment seems a bit harsh.

The Rutgers girls basketball team – A few members claim to be “scarred for life” by Imus’s statements. Wow. Is your metaphorical skin so thin that a comment by some geezer shock jock you don’t even listen to can send you into fits of depression? I’ve been called worse in client meetings. By my boss. Get over it.

Al Sharpton – Two words: Tawana Brawley.

Jesse Jackson – Two words: Shut up.

You’re welcome,

Fox